Homeless Incident, Sephora And Random Fail Date
I was about to give him a piece of my mind, but I didn’t because it wasn’t worth it.
You were not originally part of my day, and silence is bliss.
I get the upper hand by ignoring you.
Seriously, how dare you write that to me and try to lecture me when you are in the wrong because you’re upset I said you’re not worth it?
I could have tossed my drink on you several times or slapped you, but I didn’t want to cause a scene.
I was pretty chill. I am trying my best not to let anything get to me, not even the tiniest incident. It’s not worth it to put much thought on. If you’ve read my previous writings, you understand.
Today was not the best of days. First, I had to deal with a homeless man. Oh, how I dread going out alone at night in San Francisco; it is flooded with them. People are homeless for various reasons: Mental illness, being pushed out of housing, or drugs one or a combination. My evening started with me seeking a good ramen spot. I had planned to have that meal while on the West Coast. Is it weird I prefer to eat Asian food in Asian dominant spaces? (I reason it’s closer to Asia, it’ll taste much better, fresher ingredients, etc.).
The ramen I had at Mensho was delicious, and surprisingly, I added lamb to it, me who doesn’t eat that but, I was trying to be bold, and the flavor mixed with the chicken broth and duck and pork (another I don’t fancy much) was incredible. I enjoyed my meal. After that meal, I decided to walk it off. The best place to do it, right? San Francisco, with all the hills, was a cheat workout. My feet carried me to Union Square, and I stopped at my bank first to make a deposit. Unfortunately, it wasn’t accepting my pin, and I had to return the following day. I had just received a new bank card, and they changed all of that without my notice. I’d been using that pin for over 10yrs. Anyway, it was 7 pm, and I had an hour, so I walked into Macy’s. I decided to window shop the stores at “the square.” While doing that, I received a text from my sister about the “Sephora 21 day sale,” She asked me to pick up mascara for her.
The Power of Sephora
Ever go in for one product and end up with an entire basket?
Or you’re probably browsing online, and suddenly you find all these items in your cart?
I love Sephora. It’s like a guilty pleasure.
I love to window shop online, and I love to spend on beauty.
There are just so many things I want. It’s never enough!
It’s never a quick fix.
You want to be in the store or on the site for hours and hours searching and researching products; they are so good. What sorcery do you have over me?
Carrying that black and white bag or receiving a package in the mail is pure joy. Just so happy with my purchase.
I tried to avoid it as I’d done some damage a few weeks prior when they had VIB rouge 20% off. It was 700 feet away from me, and I told her I’d go pick it up, and yes, I didn’t just pick up mascara. I also got lipgloss wanted, but I quickly dashed out because I didn’t want to remember anything else I wanted. Mind you, I did circle the store a few times, and I almost drifted some more, but I had composure. Sephora was not on the cards tonight, but it happened.
As I stepped out of the store to head back to my hotel, I was approached by this homeless crazy. (Why are these creeps so bold enough to approach me? I despise it!!!
I dislike when the wrong type of man approaches me, I hate it so much!! It’s a constant thing I have to deal with when I’m walking outside, and it can be disappointing at the same time.) He had been following me for a while. I have earphones on, and I’m ignoring his babbling, telling me to “give him money or I should take him to buy food. There was a Walgreens in front of me” as I approached one. I’m still walking, minding my own business listening to an audiobook, then suddenly he grabs me by the waist, and I yell at him, WTF!!! It caused a little scene.
I hurriedly crossed the street because it was too much. I was a bit irritated and frazzled. It scared me a bit—the single female alone in a different city, who knows what else could have happened. I was fortunate.
Anyways, I walk a little, and low and behold; someone else strikes a convo with me. I eye-rolled mentally; all I wanted to do was get home. He began by complimenting my shiny shoes (my mom had gifted me those handmade in Lagos). I loved them, so I started and some small talk. Then he asks me out for a drink. I was a bit upset from my run-in earlier, so I thought whatever I already planned to go out that night when I dropped my purchases at the hotel, plus I was looking to work on more social skills.
We stopped at a dive bar, and I had a nasty mojito. It was so terrible that the bartender should be out of business bad, even after trying to fix it. But really, what else do you expect from a crappy establishment. We chat a little bit there; late 30s, Australian, lived in Asia and SF, trying to impress me and make many comments that failed in my book. We quickly left that shitty bar as it wasn’t my style, and I wasn’t enjoying myself there; the next stop was the Top of the Mark.
I find it interesting I get the most compliments from strangers when I wear these sparkly shoes. There was a drunk grandma in the elevator. She was so excited seeing them, going on about how she loves sparkly items, but mine was even shinier than her sneakers. She poses and shows me her feet ahahahaha. It was cute. Compliments from women make my day. Of course, you know I am naturally feminine, and if I can sparkle, I will. *Wink.*
The Mark was boring as usual, and there was a little wait to be seated at the bar, so we left the facility, crossed the street to the Fairmont (which I originally suggested). Do people ever listen? *Rolls eyes*
He made some silly excuse when I pointed out the bar on the floor.
Just say you can’t afford it and don’t want to buy pricey drinks, not you were not talking about the “classy bar” at the Fairmont. It was quieter there, too, so crazy.
Men are funny. Do they not know they're being judged? First impressions count. Cheap dates are not it for me.
We went to the basement bar called Tonga. Now I had a good time. I know how to have a good time even if I don't want to be someplace or with someone, e.g., this man, I will have a good time on your dime. Tonga was fun! It was my first time there; there was a live band, a dancefloor, a waterfall, exciting scenery, and a crowd. It was quite entertaining. I love live music. It would have been a fantastic night if he was a gentleman.
All night he kept trying to kiss me, and I was not ok with that. I told him no, shook my head. I said I don’t do that. I moved my head away countless times, even though he’d try to grab it to force me. Like we are "having fun." Then I told him, "You’re persistent." His reply to me was, "Yes, even if he had to try a hundred times tonight." There were multiple instances that I could have caused a scene, poured my drink on him, or slapped him, but I went out to have a good time and not let minor nobodies disrupt it. He even tried to get in my selfies too. Now, it’s not the first time I’ve gone out with random strangers I met on the street and had a blast. I’m sure lots of people do that and make new friends that way in travels too, and it could lead to friendship or just that night only (not fornication, please lol, I don’t have one night stands ever). I’m not knocking anyone who does that. I don’t. I prefer social entertainment. Me randomly going out with a stranger just depends on how I feel that day and how you approach me or how you look appearance. Only public places, of course with lots of people, safety first.
The night went on. Eventually, Tonga closed. It was around 2 am.
Then he wanted to go to another bar. I was tired and ready to be done. All I could think was, are you trying to get me drunk? It doesn’t work that way.
I turned down his suggestion. He then wanted me to go to his place and tried to kiss me some more. I had had it and told him to stop; he wasn't worth it. His mood completely changed.
Some men are so dumb and clueless, like I don't know their tricks. I’m not a child. I don't reward bad behavior.
He kept thinking I was 22. Funny and sad at the same time. He wanted to take advantage of a "22yr old". You creep! He must have watched too many "girls gone wild" videos; I’d just get drunk and kiss a random stranger like I’m a stupid kid? He must have had high hopes of getting laid, but I don’t do that for free. Like never!
Nothing in life is free; someone like me isn’t. You can enjoy my company but don’t try it with me. I figure some women are like that for some men to be so brazen. Some of the random outings I’ve been on and their forwardness. Or maybe they are just shitty men in general. He never said one thing to impress me, not one.
I took my night out as a social experiment when I can. It’s fascinating, as you can see, I'm writing about it. I never lead him on, nor did I give him any false hope. I was just my super friendly, bubbly self.
He made this "girlfriend dumb test" to me, and I laughed mentally at this idiot. As if! Lol.
"Oh, you get points here and there, blah blah,"
Uhm, who’s trying to date you? You wanted to keep me company while I was out, I never asked for your company, you inserted yourself into my evening, and I was polite.
He really thought he was a prize but was so down because I let him know his place. You should have seen his face, like a sad puppy. I’m still laughing as I write this. If I'd have know saying he wasn't worth it was the magical words I would have earlier.
I tend to know within the first few minutes; I’m sure this is the same with other ladies. I got my entertainment that night, and I didn’t have to buy drinks, but do I ever? I wanted to be social that night, and I was. Mission accomplished.
I returned to my hotel, a bit amused over the weird turn of events that evening, and turned in for the night. I woke up to a text message from him. He was so offended. It was ridiculous.
I sure he regrets meeting me because I was so fucking amazing but not dense, An awesome person to spend time with, but I wasn’t easy.
Defeated conquest and a crushed spirit. He must think I'm a bitch, but I was pretty direct. I was direct all night, but he didn’t want to listen to me or take the context clues.
Then he dared to send me such a text.
Hey, it's a real shame you had to say something that cruel. I'm not in the habit of giving this kind of feedback, but that's just not a nice thing to say to a guy. You can turn someone down without being rude about it, especially when they took you out and tried to create an enjoyable experience for you. It's disappointing because until that point, I was happy with the night we had, as random as it was. Now I just regret meeting you. I hope you never say anything that purposefully mean to someone again. It's just a shitty thing to do, honestly. Good luck in life, have a safe flight, and I wish you no ill will. Take care.
I burst out laughing when I got the text above; seriously, it was hilarious. Cry me a river. The audacity to give me feedback, do you see the see manipulative tactics? It's so sick. Men like this are trash! I didn't reply though I was tempted to; I never pressed send on my message because it wasn't worth my time and left it in drafts.
What is rude is me repeatedly telling you no to your advances all night and you not quitting till I tell you you're not worth it. Save your feedback for yourself and learn boundaries. I don't go about kissing strangers. I turned you down, but you still insisted. Funny.
As I said, he was not in my day's plan, and I intended to keep it that way. He doesn’t need glasses to tell me I’m gorgeous, and that’s what made him stop me and not my sparkly shoes. Maybe he noticed me because of my outburst with the homeless man and took a chance. He realized that I'm a high-value woman, and he could not keep up with me. I firmly believe women should know their value and their boundaries and to speak up. If a man cannot respect you, he is not worth your time.
He looked at me and thought he saw a young female he could get drunk and take advantage of, fuck him!
You should counsel yourself on approaching females and on respecting boundaries and not thinking you’re above it or special. There are no short cuts around me.
If he didn’t make all those taboos in speech or perhaps was interesting and not cheap, I’d have enjoyed going out again, socially, of course, lol. The friend zone.
Being a cheap date, I'm sure he was upset about the money he spent on drinks, but it was "just drinks." What do I look like 22yrs old and excited about alcohol? I do look young, but I hate men that make it their goal to take advantage of naive young females. Buying me drinks in no way impresses me to go home with you or invite you to my place. Uhm, no thanks. What sort of low-value energy is that? Hilarious! All the while, he was pushy the entire night. That I also hate. Sorry, I do have boundaries. If I express them, listen to me and don't push it! It will not make me like you, trust me, the opposite occurs. No means no, frankly. If I say don't kiss me, I'm serious. It's not a joke, nor will I change my mind. What is wrong with people? Is this what regular dating is? Randomly meeting chicks and kissing them, going to their homes to fuck because you bought them drinks ahahahaha. Because it's not it, some men are so disrespectful. Honestly, some of my encounters with men make me hate them, but I know not everyone is a bad egg; there's just a rotten bunch (I have a different tale I'll write about). It makes my blood boil, the pressure some of these men think they can force themselves on me and think it's ok, no! It is not. And then be upset. The audacity! Must I write about ill mannered men? The only one who should be upset is me. Yet, in their mind, they are respectful. It is my fault for being hot. WTF! I didn’t care he was upset because I already knew from the start that I was never going to see him again, especially after all those taboos he uttered from his lips.
He said I am high maintenance too. I don’t think he knows what that means because I hadn’t made any demands. I am always myself when I chat; if that’s a lot for you, we probably don’t fit. It’s not a bad thing to know my value. At least he recognizes he cannot afford me. I take high maintenance as a compliment. Somehow a conversation about camping came up, and I had mentioned “glamping” and how I do not camp and my expectations.
He was very Australian, and I wasn’t surprised at that comment. If you have experience with Australian men, you already know how they are like, cheap as fuck!